Being a product of my environment is something I did a lot of reflecting on this weekend. There are many paths to take this insight, however, this being a weight journey blog, I believe this is a direct connection.
Many people know, I was a skinny kid. I was very active. It wasn't until after I began settled in my current relationship that my weight was ever an issue. I think about the people I've developed relationships with throughout the past nine years.
Nine years ago I met my husband. The typical "eat whatever he wants and doesn't gain a pound" kinda dude. In the early years of our relationship, money was never an issue. He lived at home, didn't have a car payment and made a decent income. Trying to impress his new girlfriend; Italian and appreciative of delicious and decadent foods, he would often take me out to dinner. I have always been the type of girl who would rather hang out with the guys than chat with the girls and I definitely was not a girl who would be asked out on date and only order a salad. I am not dainty. I always thought I had to "impress" a guy with my ability and confidence to eat as much as they could. Why? It makes no sense.
Seven years ago I starting working a full time 9am-5pm "big girl" job. This is where I became even more a product of my environment. My active lifestyle was now stolen away by early alarm clocks and late traffic. I sat behind a computer most of the day, socializing through email and telephone. No reason to walk to a person's office, right? Working in commercial real estate, I dealt with a lot of contractors and vendors who, kindly enough, would send treats to the office from Halloween until Valentine's Day. Not to mention the neverending birthday celebrations we had.
Even further into my environment, I think about the people I surrounded myself with. Quite honestly, my best friend at the time was much heavier than I was. She and I became BFF office buddies and would do lunch out of the office at least 80% of the week. Wendy's, McDonald's, PF Changs, Go Roma, Noodles & Co., etc. We worked in an area that had a plethora of food choices. I always had it in my mind that I was the "skinny" friend and it didn't matter that I ate out all the time. Naturally, our friendship evolved from lunch dates at work to happy hour, dinner during the week, meeting on the weekends. If I wasn't with my husband, I was with her. Our plans always included a meal. I'm not blaming her at all. Still when I make plans with friends it typically includes a meal or happy hour, however, I'm aware now.
At one point in our friendship, she became aware and starting changing her diet in order to lose weight. At some point, she weighed less than I. She has continued to maintain her weight loss, however, for other personal reasons we are no longer close. I am reminded though, that because I was surrounding myself with peole, at a time, who weren't aware of what they are eating affected me as well.
I shortly began my journey after our friendship fizzled.
What led me to this post, however, was this past weekend. Friday evening I spent time with two new people, one whom I had just met on Friday because I was tagging along with another friend to a holiday party. Both these girls are thin. At the holiday party, the catered food looked so delicious and I later found out tasted so delicious. However, the main course protein was large. I could have easily eaten the entire piece, however, one of the girls asked if one of us would like to split it. We both offered to split and ended up splitting it into thirds. With that smaller piece, plus a little salad and veggie and small scoop of a pasta salad, I was extremely happy with the choices I made. Had I gone alone, or not buddied with these ladies, I would have eaten far more than I would have needed to.
So I start to think, these are good people that I should surround myself with and that will support (perhaps, indirectly) my food choices and lifestyle.
For those reading, who are currently in the beginning or middle of your journey, re-assess who it is you are filling your environment with. That can make all the different, honestly. Many people that I've met along the way have restructured their relationships to benefit them in a positive way. Is there a person, or people who hinder your lifestyle changes? How can we gain control of our environment?
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