Stressed = Desserts

I always get a laugh when I see that the word "stressed" is "desserts" backwards. It makes me think that someone, somewhere, in the land of creating words and definitions has a sick, sick sense of humor.

I'm not a dessert person, really. I have mentioned before that my weakness is more of the salty snacks, rather than the sweet. At this point, I have a good hold on my salt cravings and rarely give in. Recently, I have been really stressed out. The kind of stressed out that makes my face look like that of my high school students, which only stresses me out more. I typically handle stress pretty well, most the time I don't even realize I'm stressed when others see I am. I believe my attention to detail and my time management abilities reduce a lot of stress I would otherwise experience.
All week I have had a craving for cake. It is really strange and I almost laugh at the craving because I know although I crave it, that does not mean I'll eat it. Anyone who knows me, knows I don't really even like cake. Frosting hurts my teeth in a wicked way. It is just a weird craving. Yesterday at work (student teaching), we celebrated a birthday for a very important person at the school. There was a potluck brunch, no big deal - but then I saw that beautiful cake! Funny thing was, as soon as I saw the cake in all its' frosting glory - I lost my craving. In no way am I saying that I'm superior in that I have the ability for cake to look disgusting after craving it for a week, it was just a strange feeling. And it is not to say I don't give into other cravings. After being sick and barely eating for four days (lost 3.2 lbs), I craved nothing more than a gyro and fries once my appetite returned. And you can bet I ate that gyro and fries. I worked really hard that week to maintain the 3.2 lbs loss from being ill and luckily I had.

Back to handling stress....

On one hand, I am glad that when I am stressed, I'm not an eater. On the other hand, I become a very quiet, secluded person, which is just as bad. I don't want to do anything, have any conversation with anyone and just be under my covers alone. Last night, Kristian suggested that I go to my favorite pub, have a few drinks and sing some songs since it was karaoke night. I was still in my "mood" and could not make a decision which I also don't like. Indecisiveness is just not me. I made the decision to get out for a few hours and I think it's just what I needed. I had not been out in quite a while and karaoke always makes me happy, I received a ton of compliments from some of the regulars I had not seen in a while, and I even danced in some activity points. One friend told me to "go eat a pork chop or something." While I know I'm not at goal yet and I'm at the very top of my healthy weight guideline, I never imagined I would be in a conversation where someone is telling me it looks like I need a little food in my belly. It's a good feeling.

With all that being said, I am back to my regular, happy, chipper self today. I begin some personal training today to tone my newly defined abs and arms to be ready for swimsuit season. I think that is just what I need to shed these last 10 lbs or so and hit goal. Oh, I also have a phone interview with Weight Watchers in two weeks, to hopefully become a leader of my own meetings. I am so excited to being that new journey.

Until then, I'll leave you with this.

"A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety."

Finding the Silver Lining

By now I'm sure you know I did not get the commercial. I was disappointed and sad by the phone call from New York saying I was not chosen this time around, but the experience was one that not many get to do. Like I said before I knew my fate, I have worked extremely hard the past year on my weight loss journey and to some, 50-60 pounds to lose is not much to recognize, but until you have done it, it is so much harder than you think. 

I am one to always find the silver lining. I always think there are reasons why something happens or does not happen. During the time I was to be in California, Japan was hit by a massive earthquake, putting California until Tsunami warnings. Fortunately, California was spared damages, unlike Japan, but I found this to possibly be a reason why it was not my time to be in California. 

I also have not written lately because I have been uber sick for the past week with an upper respiratory infection. I could barely talk without coughing and the coughing began to hurt my body so bad I was physically exhausted, even after taking multiple naps throughout the day. I also had no appetite. 

Silver lining...?

I went to my weigh-in Monday night, just to weigh-in and leave and I had lost 3.2lbs. That's about unheard of at this stage in the game and so close to my goal. Now to keep that off for the next weigh-in. I know I may gain a little of it back, that happens when you go from eating next to nothing to your regular daily points again, but certainly not all 3.2 lbs of it. 

So this put me at 132.4 lbs. That's only .4 lbs until medically I'm not considered overweight anymore. 

It's time I start thinking harder about my goal weight and what I can maintain. 116 lbs might be a bit too thin, that was my original goal. I also need to make sure it is something I can maintain for the rest of my life. For anyone who thinks Weight Watchers ends when you hit your goal weight, you are mistaken. Those are the people who put it all back on. This is a lifelong journey and I intend to see it through until the last day.

Commercial Update

As many of you know, I applied about a month ago to be looked upon for the next Weight Watchers commercial. Everything has happened so quickly since sending in my application, when a week later the casting company called me for an interview later that week!

I had my first interview last Thursday. It was a web conference because the casting company is in New York City. When I got to my interview and was connected via web cams to the casting director, I was more than excited to introduce myself to her. There were basic questions; what's your name? Tell me a little bit about you. I told her how I am a special education teacher, I love to sing karaoke, I've lost 53 (well, now 54) pounds on Weight Watchers, etc. Then she went in to asking me questions specific to Weight Watchers. How do PlusPoints fit into your daily schedule? (How doesn't it?) What is your favorite part of the new PlusPoints system? Do you utilize eTools?

It was all cookie cutter kinds of questions that I was more than able to reply to. After all, I've never believed in a program so much and there isn't anyone this program is not for! Whether it 100lbs or 10lbs you want to lose, Weight Watchers is the way to go, so it made it easy to talk so positively about the program. At the end of the interview she asked me if there was anything else I'd like to add for the director/producer to see. Surprisingly, I got a bit emotional. I explained that I have worked extremely hard in the past year and I've truly made this a lifestyle and so many thing have changed for the better in the past year, a lot because of Weight Watchers. I explained how I gained my confidence back and how I believe I truly do deserve this opportunity. If you know me, I'm not much of a crier, but the water works made an appearance. Honestly, thinking about it I think it's silly how I was so emotional, but really, it IS an emotional journey and unless you've made the changes and have the sense of control over your own life, it's hard to understand.

Luckily, they must have loved my emotion because Friday (day after interview), I was called in for a second interview the follow Monday.

As luck would have it, I was sicker than a dog on Monday, but as they say, "the show must go on."

It was a much shorter interview. She asked for a recap of who I am, what I like to do and my weight loss journey in a nutshell. Then asked me to add anything else I've thought of since my first interview. I added that I think I would be marketing to a different demographic. Typically when I think of Weight Watchers, I think of older people. Maybe women with multiple kids, little time for the gym or even older than that. I've opened up the option of Weight Watchers to many of my friends even younger than I, and I think it's a great chance for us younger ones to get a good control on our weight before it becomes more difficult.

So, two interviews down. Next step is filming. I will find out tomorrow if I am chosen to be flown to Los Angeles (March 8-14th). I could technically still end up on the editing room floor at the end of filming, but quite frankly, getting this opportunity would be enough. I would still get paid for every day I am there ($550/day) but if I do get on air then it's much more, or so they tell me.

Regardless of what happens, I've thought about both interviews and what I've said and there is nothing I would have said differently, added, or not said at all. I can honestly say I am very happy with how I presented myself and I can only pray that they are too. If I get the call tomorrow that I did not make it through to the filming, I will be no doubt disappointed, but I will remain proud of the accomplishments I've made. I have obviously done enough right to be recognized so strongly. I've gained a lot of supported and have inspired others. That is reward enough.

That being said, I do hope I get a call tomorrow telling me to pack my bags. :-)